Where do we go from here…….

Thank you Buffy the Vampire Slayer and their musical episode for supplying me with the title for today’s blog.

I am not really sure on what to write today.  Christmas is done, the wrapping paper carefully balled up and awaiting its next stop…the dump.  The presents gone through and the favorites rise to the top.  I look about my livingroom and survey the damage:  die-cast cars and monster trucks in one heap( i assume a demolition crash ensued), a stack of movies over there, numerous instructions on the latest Lego build over here and there, and look!!!! orange moon sand strewn all across the dining room floor!  Guess who is NOT going to pick that up today!

I wonder if they know….wonder if in spite of all the gifts and food and laughter, i wonder if they know what is most important?  At what age do we lose the magic of the mystery…the anticipation, the squeals of joy.  When do we lose that…should we cast it off in favor of something more mature?  I am not sure.

I always feel a bit of a let down after Christmas, no, it’s not the gifts.  Although I would be lying to say that I do not LOVE LOVE LOVE a gaily wrapped package with my name on it.  The days after leave me feeling –lonely.  All the hype, the build-up, the consumption–then silence.  (Wow, if I read that sentence out of context, there could be a couple of topics left to the imagination…)  How do we carry the anticipation of goodness and light to the other 364 days? 

Truth be told, I am peeved to walk out and see the moon sand all over the floor.  I am committing that I am not the one to clean it up, although we both know I will have a hand in it.  I am angered to see the cars and trucks littering the floor.  Is it kids claiming their spot, or an ingrained sense of entitlement and ungratefulness?  Have I fostered this?  Have I contributed to this?  What should be my response?  Where do I go from here?

Systems thinking would tell me that if I clean up the mess before they return home, they will not change the behavior.  “Oh look, we made a mess, mom cleaned it up!  Let’s do it again.”  Note pattern established….  Ah, to bust the mold from whence we act.  So, amid screaming and tantrum I will attempt to re-direct said response and allow them the honor of taking responsibility for their actions.  I am MOM, after all, I giveth and I can taketh away for a time-out.  (NOTE DS grounding in consideration. ) 

All this to say that I want something different this time…something worth holding for more than a season.  Something to tap into when the humdrum has me.  I can foster that and I can carry that to others.  The light, the joy, the compassion that exists no matter the situation.  May I understand what that means and may I apply it as a way of life…

For those singing the Buffy song, I have supplied the link…one of the best episodes I remember seeing…yes I cried. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=ac1xnq8UV1E

Shalom,

cahl

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